Tagged: V-Day

Top 10 things (not) to get your valentine

By Olivia DeFrances, Staff Writer
@abstratinspire

Creepy? Yes. Good Valentine's Day surprise? No, not so much. PHOTO VIA tumblr.com

Creepy? Yes. Good Valentine’s Day surprise? No, not so much. PHOTO VIA tumblr.com

It’s that time of year again–Valentine’s Day. And whether it’s out of the kindness of your heart or pressure from a significant other, you probably will end up buying a gift for that special someone. If you do, it’s best to give a gift with meaning; something that pertains to their interests rather than the typical roses or chocolate. It’ll show that you really care, that you have been paying attention to that person, rather than just trying to get out of the dog house. Here are the top ten strangest, funniest, or downright rejection-worthy Valentine ’s Day gifts:

  1. When your significant other says that you don’t have to get them anything, they’re just trying to sound cute and modest. Don’t surprise them with nothing. “Look honey! I got you nothing, just like you asked!” You laugh now, but people actually do this.
  2. Anything that sings – whether it is a card or you go all the way and hire someone to surprise them at work. Nothing is more embarrassing than having “I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU” belted at you from an inanimate object or a guy in a cupid suit.
  3. Houseware. Seriously, if you’re trying to tell them they need to clean more, don’t do it on Valentine ’s Day. Nothing says “I love you” less than oven mits, a new vacuum, or a laundry basket, no matter how good the intentions are.
  4. Personal grooming objects. Ew. It’s sketchy and slightly offensive.
  5. A break up. It’s surprising, actually, the amount of people who break up ON Valentine’s Day. Kind of ironic. Maybe that was their intention? I don’t know. Just don’t do it. You will scar the other person for life.
  6. Cheap, tacky jewelry. Seriously, guys, if you’re going to go for the jewelry, just go all out. A grown woman will not appreciate plastic hearts from Claire’s.
  7. If you’re not serious yet and you get them some sort of distinctively intimate gift to insinuate being serious….well, just don’t do it. Nothing says creepy like a photo album full of each others’ baby photos after a few weeks.
  8. Cheap sidewalk stand flowers. She can tell. She can always tell. And always make sure that she’s not allergic if you go with real, good flowers. Because a severe allergic reaction was not your intended gift. And if it was, it’s time to re-think the relationship!
  9. A movie date- to a movie only you want to see.
  10. Boxer briefs.

One last tip: If you’re in a relationship, don’t worry too much. You should show your love for each other every day, not just today. And if you’re single, congratulations! You don’t have to deal with any of this nonsense.