Overheard on Comm. Ave.

Though I tend to mumble incomprehensibly much of the time, I’ve found my peers have no trouble voicing their opinions, quite loudly I might add. As I go throughout my day, mindlessly trekking through the snow, I often catch bits and pieces of conversations, many of which are sexual, profane, utterly confusing, or all of the above. Occasionally I’ll hear something mundane about the weather or an assignment, but mostly I’m struggling to contain my shock/outrage/laughter as I listen in on those around me. I hate to give myself away as a perpetual “creeper”, as it gives me great pleasure to eavesdrop on people, but some things I overhear around campus are just too good to be kept to myself.  The following snippets have proved memorable in my eavesdropping experiences:

-“It’s like a penis with flags on it!” – outside Shelton Hall

-“I’d rather die in surgery” – Towers

-“I’m gonna tell you if your swag is off” – GSU

-“Today is the first day I’m not high or drunk” – Warren Dining Hall (mac and cheese line)

-“Do you need a kidney?” – Towers elevator

-“Grandma’s a prostitute” – Comm. Ave

Compiled by Sarah Payne, DFP Staff


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