By Michelle Jay, Multimedia Editor
Now that November has ended, it’s time to see how the gentleman of the FreeP faired at No Shave November after our initial look at them. Spoiler alert: no one made it all the way through. Various reasons were given: interviews, itchy, scraggly, life. Here’s where they each stood on returning from Thanksgiving break on Dec. 1., as decided by me.
Winner: Kyle, City Editor.
Despite shaving probably a few times, Kyle still wins. He keeps his neat and tidy and looks quite nice with his new haircut.
Runner-up: Steve, city associate.
I’m pretty sure he shaved at some point as well. Or else he might look a bit like Steve the Pirate right now.
The rest in no real order:
He, like the rest, gave up and shaved a few days before Thanksgiving break. He said it was getting too scraggly and disgusting. But he hasn’t shaved since then. He’s back to trying.
Brian, opinion editor.
He was never really trying as his television duties keep him clean shaven.
Conor, sports associate
Conor gave up the day after the original post and shaved multiple times since then. Despite his nice start, this admission dropped him out of the running for winner.
Andrew, sports associate
Also gave up, also shaved multiple times, also could have won.
And that’s how the males of the FreeP do No Shave November.
By Michelle Jay, Multimedia Editor
Unlike last year’s fall office, this year’s fall e-board and associates group is more evenly balanced between guys and gals. This means No Shave November is a go in the FreeP office. Here’s our boys’ beginning stages.
Conor, Sports Associate
Our Southie boy, Conor matches his classic Boston accent with a nice start to his beard. Currently, he is in second for the best beard. Plus Clancy, his Boston Terrier, wins him some points.
Steven, City Associate
He’s yet another one who can grow a man beard. He’s on his way.
As for the ladies of the FreeP, our general opinion is that beards are not our favorite things. Rachel, campus associate, put it best saying, “A survey of Daily Free Press staff opinions reveals that while very few women staff members are turned on by facial hair, 99 percent of staff members, both male and female, would not walk away if J-Kraz [John Krasinski of “The Office”] leaned in at a bar.”
By Olivia DeFrances, Staff Writer
It’s that time of the year when the remnants of No Shave November can be seen here, there and everywhere. The fellas just don’t want to let that fuzz they’ve harvested for more than a month go. And while a bushy, well-trimmed mustache on the right man can be lovely, let’s face it—most ‘staches don’t make the grade. Guys: do yourselves a favor and shave the ‘stache. Decembeard is not a thing. Though parting with your mouth brow might be hard, Youtubers Rhett and Link share the best way to make it a sweet goodbye. It’s complete with an entire Viking funeral at the end, so you can bid your mustache a proper adieu and make sure its memory lives on.
Your upper lip, free of that crumb holder, will thank you.
By Hilary Ribons, Staff Writer
It’s that time of year again. The month before Christmas when the faces of millions of normal American men become engulfed in mountain-men level facial hair.
No Shave November—The chagrin of women (and some men) everywhere.
I hate to break it to you, but copious facial hair: not sexy. Not even a little bit. Please, do us a favor, and shave your face on a regular basis unless your beard is sexy. It’s hard to nail, and few are.
It’s a long withstanding social movement that coincides with the infamous month. Movember, a word combining mustache and November, is a movement that takes advantage of No Shave November by making it into a way to raise money and awareness for prostate cancer.
“… these selfless and generous men, known as Mo Bros, groom, trim and wax their way into the annals of fine moustachery,” according to the charity’s website, Movember and Sons. “Supported by the women in their lives, Mo Sistas, Movember Mo Bros raise funds by seeking out sponsorship for their Mo-growing efforts.”
For No Shave November, you can’t shave at all. For Movember, however, a mustache is required. Therefore, your sideburns can’t touch your mustache, and your chin hair can’t touch it either because that would make it a goatee. This is difficult for most gentlemen.
Of course, hipsters everywhere have extended No Shave November to a year round event, pruning and shaping their mustaches or beards to levels not seen since the 19th century. Maybe they’re protesting the manufacturing procedures of razor producers. Maybe they’re protesting the mainstream clean-shaven look. But most likely, they are just trying to be ironic. We will never know.
But since it seems we can’t stop the onslaught of unshaven men, maybe we can at least attribute a cause to it. So if you are a guy (or a girl, no prejudice) participating in this phenomenon, at least try to raise money for an actual cause. At least Movember has some ground rules.
Enjoy an extreme case of beard, unfolding here:
By Lauren Dezenski, Online Editor
Girls run the world at the FreeP this semester (to steal the phrase from Beyoncé). With an e-board made up of all ladies except for Kevin the sports editor, No Shave November doesn’t quite meet its original meaning. But thank goodness for the associates: Tyler, Chris and Jasper (plus assistant Greg) are all in some state of facial hairiness.
Thus, I’m honored to present the Novembeards of the FreeP.
Kevin Dillon, sports editor and our reigning Novembeard champion. Well, that doesn’t actually exist because I just made it up, but Kevin *IS* sporting the sickest beard at 648 Beacon St.
When asked to describe his beard, Kevin said, “It got real itchy, so I have had to shave the neck part of the beard.”
Neck beard grows in three times as fast as the regular beard, Kevin said, and had he not taken preventative measures, he would “look like Gandalf with a neard.” Neard is a portmanteau of “neck” and “beard.” That Kevin, always combining words.
Chris Lisinski, current campus associate and next semester’s campus editor. This weekend was the interview process for postion selection (congrats to all chosen), and because of this, Chris was forced to shave off his beginnings of a Novembeard. As of Monday night, Chris is steadfast in his pursuit of the truest Novembeard, despite this weekend’s razor action.
I’m thinking that shaving process looked a little something like this:
Fear not, Chris. Beards grow back.
Resident cherub and City Associate Jasper Craven. Baby boi is next semester’s city editor and with his clean shaven face, boasts the face of a baby angel.
I see you with those Beats headphones, Jaspy.
Don’t be fooled by his cherubic visage ladies and gents. During last week’s snowstorm, Jasper was riding his bike to cover an event for the FreeP, fell and scraped up his knee, thus BLEEDING FOR THE FREEP. That’s dedication if I know any.
Exhibit D and E:
Tyler Lay and Gregory Davis. Tyler is next semester’s managing editor and has no care for maintaining his Novembeard. What a party pooper. However Greg, next semester’s sports editor, is keeping the enthusiasm alive and is a true gem.
Let us heed the words of Kanye West in light of these Novembeards: “No one man should have all that power.”
Stay tuned for updates on the beards’ progress as November elapses.